I've been feeling discontent lately with how my life is. I go through stages. There are days, months even that I'm completely satisfied with my life and the blessings God has given me. Then I have these valley's where I wonder why He hasn't given me the one thing my heart desires more than anything else.
I know all the scripture references and I know that I should be content in all things, but it's hard to be content when my heart desires a husband to share things with. To be there to comfort me and to share life with.
So many people tell me I'm so lucky to be single. But I often wonder if they really stopped to think about that phrase if they would truly mean it. Sure, I don't have to consult with someone else about financial matters or big purchases. But I also DON'T HAVE anyone to consult with about financial matters or big purchases. It would be nice not to have to make so many decisions alone.
The old adage about 'the grass is always greener' certainly comes into play here. I know that marriage is not always easy. My rose colored glasses are clear enough to know that married couples face challenges that I can't even begin to comprehend. But, truthfully, I don't understand how fighting with someone, and subsequently making up with them, can be worse than living a life alone.
I know that God has a plan and I really am ok with it, it's just that there are days where I just wish His plan for me were different. I'm sure one of these days it will all make perfect sense, but until then, I'll keep praying for contentment, because right now, I'm not feeling it!